Thursday, December 29, 2011

Revlon Hotties

While searching Google Hot Trends to see what was trending I noticed Emma Stone was on the top 20 list. Naturally, I clicked on her name since she’s on My Top 10 List. Yeah, you know, the list you make when you have a girlfriend that says, “If given the chance to sleep with any of these people, I am allowed to and you cannot be mad about it.” The list that no longer makes any sense to have when you are single, but you decide to keep it anyway, because having a list with women’s names on it makes you feel like a man. Yeah, that list.

So, apparently she is trending because her new ad as one of Revlon’s “Global Ambassadors” is out. The other Ambassador...Olivia Wilde! You serious? Another lucky lady from My Top 10?! And yes it makes her lucky. Don’t be a smart ass and question it! Sure the list isn’t published and it was created by me, but it’s still flattering! Regardless, Revlon just made a fan out of me! They took two beautiful women from My Top 10, maybe the list inspired them, and made them Ambassadors! One of my favorite words I never use AND they have a super hot ad each I get to look at! You may have a new supporter and customer in me, Revlon!

OK, so they sell make-up and junk that I do not use. But I know some people who use it. So, I’ll just buy from them and give it to those friends! That’s one way to support them! Or I’ll just continue to stare at their beautiful ads. That’s a better way I think. Cheaper for me. And now the weird situation of me entering the same CVS every day to buy make-up and scaring the female employees won’t be happening!

I’m also feeling pretty good about my list having inspired a major company like Revlon. That’s crazy that I had that sort of impact on them. I’m glad I could help but it’s obvious my work isn’t done. They need a little more help from me. They need two more from my list. Four beautiful women with ads would be the perfect amount. So, let’s take a look at my list. In no order! I have not yet decided on the order of the ladies. I just know who the Top 10 are. Some people are confused by that but it makes perfect sense to me. You know the top 10 prettiest women in your head, their places in The Top 10 depend on availability, ability to massage, conversation skills and favorite color. Obviously I can’t have the answers to a lot of those right now so the order is yet to be determined.

So, getting back to the task at hand, they already grabbed Emma Stone and Olivia Wilde from my list. Great choices Revlon! Now they need two more from my list. Just picking two random girls from the list, let’s go with Mila Kunis and Heather Morris, the blonde girl who plays Brittany on “Glee”. I don’t watch “Glee”, not my show, but the times I’ve ended up having to sit through it she is the one saving grace. Quite nice to look at. In the movie I remember hearing her talk about her boobs in 3D which sounded like it would be really cool. That’s basically the only thing I remember from the pieces I’ve seen of that movie.

So, there you go Revlon. You’re halfway there! Just follow my simple steps and you’ll have a killer combo ad! And in return for letting you use the gold to be found in my unpublished list I’m still confused you got a hold of, I only ask for a small cut. 2% of all revenue generated from these ads. Or if you don’t want that added to the books or that’s a little steep, let’s just say, uncounted piles of cash to be passed to me under the table and information on the girls about their availability, massage skills, conversation skills, and favorite colors. The essentials. Then, that way my very important list can finally be put in order and completed!

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