Dear Diary, I wasn't expecting today to be filled with so much action. After jumping up in the air, slamming my head on a shiny box and busting it open, a bunch of shrooms fell out onto the ground. Well, just one fell out but it started sliding around on the ground immediately. Naturally, I sprinted towards it and ate that thing whole. Luigi always says shrooms take awhile to kick in but I doubled in size instantly! I thought, "Mamma Mia, this is perfect! I'll finally be able to kiss Princess Toadstool somewhere other than the knees!" But then, out of a nearby pipe, a plant with a head started blindly shooting these fire boogers at me! I say blindly because it had no eyes. But this must have been the Stevie Wonder of Fire-Booger-Shooting-Plants because it was on it's mark! I couldn't let one of those fire boogers touch me! It would probably shrink me (for who knows what reason?) and I couldn't go back to my cherie amour Princess Toadstool like that! I jumped clear over the guy and ran away! I didn't stop, just kept running! Eventually, these ugly brown muffins with loafers started waddling my way. Of course, I jumped on their heads and squashed them into batter. I thought later on, perhaps I shouldn't have assumed these muffins had evil intentions just because they were ugly. Maybe they were just looking for chocolate chips for their heads. But alas, I am Mario. I shoot first, ask questions last. Anyway, so those guys are dead and I'm still running! These shrooms are insane! I even saw flying turtles, I think! Well, eventually I did an awesome jump off a super high outdoor staircase to nothing and grabbed onto a random flagpole. I slid down to the bottom and as someone set fireworks off in the distance, I meandered into a nearby castle to throw up. Luigi always says shrooms make you throw up. I guess he was right about that.